Life with the W's - Ups and Downs

  Hello again. On my recent carers' art therapy course, finished 2 weeks ago, I drew a cartoon strip called "Life with the Wilsons", based on my family life. Our surname begins with W, but it's not Wilson! We have had a funny old past 2 weeks. Today I got involved with 2 sofas outside our neighbour's house. She has thrown them out, and I've been trying to find a good home for them. I hate to see something still good and useful being wasted; I'm a keen recycler! We do not need them ourselves, nor does my sister or my main church household. But a friend at church might, so I emailed her with photos I took of the 2 sofas, and asked her to let me know if she wants them. I've covered up the sofas to protect them from the rain. The council will remove them in 5 days. The next day she said she didn't need that type of sofa, so they're still waiting outside my neighbour's garden for collection.

The above photo is of a recent happy day when my nearest sister H. came over for a strawberry tea with cake, for my birthday (I shall not repeat my age!). My husband Dave and I sat, relaxed in the garden and my sister took the photo. We do not often have such a quiet, relaxed time together. That was 3 weeks before my son Tom came out of prison; there is much more for me to do now. He is having to reclaim his social welfare benefits that were cut off while he was inside. He is also doing quite well, using his AA programme, "one day at a time" as they say in the addiction fellowships. I'm also using my Al Anon programme; I go twice a week almost without missing. It helps me deal with what comes up, that's unexpected. The worst thing recently was finding out that poor little Cleo, our female black cat, has a terminal cancer (see recent blog). Latest news of her is that she seems still quite well - the Vet put her on a special diet, and she still skips about, except when it's very hot - then both cats (including her bigger brother Charlie, who often chases her) just lie about dozing. She is so affectionate and sweet....

Tom is doing pretty well, as I've said - but we must not project. He has the hard task of reapplying for benefits, an extremely complicated process. I'm helping him a bit, and so is his social worker. He now has all his social work team back - plus the probation officer, so he is well supported. He's been going to another church for the past month - the Kensington Temple or 'KT'. It is also charismatic and evangelical, and he's happier there. No-one there knows too much yet about his past, but he will have to disclose something to them soon. He just felt too harshly judged and restricted by the leaders at his earlier church, the Jesus Fellowship (or Army) which I still belong to. We both found this very hard, but I've had to endure knowing that Tom may be on a different path in his walk with God. I have close friends and relationships in the JA/JF church, which I do not wish to lose, so am carrying on with them.

Last weekend I spent a day near Brighton by the South coast, with the London JA, in their coach. It was a 4-hour, tedious journey as the M23 route was blocked, but once there we had a great time. A big barbecue in the Brighton house garden - then some "sisters" and I walked down to the beach, paddled in the sea and sat by it. Again - such great relaxation, hearing the waves wash on the shingle! I bought and ate a chocolate icecream cone, from a kiosk. There's a picture of me looking very happy - so I may post that next time. I ended up staying the night in what was formerly a nun's tiny bedroom at the London church house (once a convent), as it was so late when we got back. That was my first time staying over in their new building in Central London - I really felt at home there, and felt I'd found my feet again.

Dave's been stressed out trying to mend the latch on our front garden gate - it had come loose. He tried several things, but will have to go to the hardware shop and buy some cement (he did - the next day). That's probably what is needed. He is quite obsessional in trying to mend things without the proper materials - like other men? Or maybe just some... I'm not into the view that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, but sometimes it seems that way. I would have left it until I had the right tools and cement.

One of my late daughter's friends, E., who became a vicar - a priest in the Church of England, is becoming a full priest in late September, and we've been invited to the ceremony. We will also go to tea with her and her newish husband K., later that month. She has put Tom on her prayer notice board; also she is expecting her first child. Alice would have been pleased for her. Others of Alice's friends now have small kids. I would have been a granny by now - something I may not become unless Tom procreates kids later on. Quite a lot of my women friends are grandmas now...

I recently ordered a portable TV set with DVD/CD player for Tom, as a birthday present in advance - his 30th, which should have been more special, was crap (excuse me!), as he was in court being sentenced for a few months. Now his 31st may be better. I had a real game setting up the TV - at first I got it into Dutch somehow. I had to try to change it by reading the menu in Dutch! I know German, so that helped. Then I programmed it, and it's now running. The DVD section works fine, and Tom was very grateful - so he should be! I've also ordered a new storage cabinet to keep many of our videos and DVDs, as we cannot store them all now. Some videos are in a huge box in our front room, after we moved a pile of them out to have a new carpet laid in our living room, 3 weeks ago. (Poor little Cleo was sick on it fter 3 days; I lay a cover sheet down on it over night now.)

OK, that's all for now. On TV there is a programme about memory. Not a big problem for me, but it is for Dave. He needs memory aids. I also have to cook - spaghetti Bolognese, which I alternate with "Chinese" stir fry on Wednesdays. C U later...

Love - and peace (can we ever get that? It's war over again! Look at today's news, and tell me it is not scary. We must find a way out of this.) - Tigey.