A Happy 2006 - and Good Personal News Continued...

Dear readers -

Best wishes for a happy 2006. We are still early in the New Year, and I hope it is better than the last (at least for me, my family, and the United Kingdom - and all those who have suffered in so many of the world's disasters of 2005). Our festive season was not as bad as I'd expected - as Al Anon say, don't be bound by expectations - things are never as one predicts. Go easy - let go and let God... I have been working toward serenity, and achieved it most of the time.

Christmas was OK - almost good! We have actually had Tom back with us, as he was amazingly freed on Appeal on Dec. 21st at the Royal Courts of Justice in central London. He has since then been back home, doing a 3-year community sentence that has replaced the short prison term he had. He is now seeing a probation officer once a week, and will soon have to attend certain classes, plus sign a register weekly. He is re-registering with the local mental health services (to get his social worker back), and going to AA again. He is in a fairly good state of mind - at first he was great, as he was overjoyed to be released in time for the festive season. He enjoyed Christmas, but he found New Year (especially New Year's Eve on Jan 31st) challenging. That is because so many people drink and celebrate madly, even letting off fireworks. We were only at home - but D. and I had drinks in the house.

I did go to a very pleasant house party at my good neighbours' house next door on New Year's Day - but without D., as he had a chest infection over the whole holiday period. They had lovely buffet food, and quizzes on current affairs, one on identifying pictures of TV/film/pop stars and one on guessing prices of goods in various catalogues! (I did best on the first and the last - it shows my age!) I met several neighbours and some people from my old (local) church - good to catch up. Also just after Christmas, we commemorated our late daughter Alice - on what would have been her 33rd birthday on December 27th (we wrote her a "birthday" card, and lit candles that evening. Could not visit her grave in Oxford as D. was too unwell to drive that day.) Just after New Year Tom and I went to the movies (to see the "Narnia" film: beautiful), and to the local theatre to see the pantomime, Aladdin (very good fun, with innocent laughs and singalongs).

Christmas had its fraught moments - our fairy lights would not work, and then our immersion water heater "died" - we had to get an emergency electrician in on Dec. 23rd - it cost us a lot. The 2 cats were settling in even more - Charlie, the big, nervous male black cat, now likes to lie on D's kingsize double bed where he really likes us to stroke him, and even rolls over - he has a very loud purr! He is a gorgeous large cat with silky coat. But he is still scared of Tom, who is quite new in the house (just over 2 weeks now). Tom comes along with heavy footsteps, and Charlie rushes for safety under the wardrobe. He went missing again just before Xmas - I reported him lost, but then we found he had been under that wardrobe all the time! We have had the cats for 2 months, and feel that they are both part of the family now. We now have good photos of Charlie, one of which I will post soon.

Cleo, our small black female cat (see photo on earlier blog), is fine emotionally, but sadly she has an ear condition which is quite serious. She has lesions beside her ears from scratching. It turns out she has polyps deep in her ears, and may well need an operation in a few weeks, as she keeps getting infections in the ears, making her scratch them. She is back on medication again; after a few days of it her ears afer getting better in the short term. She is a sweet little puss, who loves going out through the catflap into the garden. (She soon learnt to do that! They did not have a catflap at their old home.) She has met Jack, the tabby next door, a few times; and another black "full" tomcat has also been sniffing around. Charlie has still not found his way out - he is still behind Cleo in adapting, but is getting more familiar with the house. He loves his food; that's why he is a bit overweight! When he goes out that may wear off a bit.

I will add to this soon (Done! - Sunday Jan. 8th: see below). I was just too busy to blog over the festive season, and have left out a lot. We had a good social day on Christmas Eve, going to my sister H's for tea (had a few games, chats and nice food), though D. was too ill to go. Later, I sang in the Midnight Mass at our local church, that night - a beautiful experience, as ever. The decorations came down on 12th Night (I did get them up - including some lights), and then it was all back to the routine - and hard work... The house looks rather bleak without all the glitter.

[Added 1/8] Yesterday and today we had a recourse to anxiety over Tom. Yesterday we found a late report in one of 3 local papers on Tom's Appeal Court case of Dec. 21st, saying what had happened:- ".... Freed by Judges". The headline was quite unpleasant, though the details of the case were given in a straightforward way. This was a shock, and D. and I decided not to tell Tom - maybe a mistake. But then today he overheard me telling my "shepherd" at our church in London, who was asking after him. He was really upset and panicky; this did not end when I explained. Since we got home he has calmed down. Probably there will be no comeback - the report was buried on an inside page in a free paper that not everyone reads. His own friends and former young associates are unlikely to read it; only middle-aged people read such gossip sheets. Most of our neighbours don't know him. If there had not been an appeal case, and he had stayed in prison, there would never have been any publicity - as there was none when the case was first heard. Still, it really alarmed us - and I was upset and ashamed at the mistake I'd made, at not being more discreet. I still need to learn! Tom is now carrying on with his rehabilitation programme.

After all that - and this unexpected drama - a Happy New Year to you, again!

Love and peace for 2006 - Tigey