Further help with son's Mental Health problems --- seeking.

Hi.
I won't have time to write much yet, but will continue this blog soon.

Our son Tom is settling in again in the same Acute Ward, but it was extremely hard to get him back in there. He was behaving in a chaotic way again - only 2 weeks or less after coming out before. He had strong mood swings, which led him back to heavy drinking, after trying soft drugs (cannabis - "dope") to try to self medicate. He had also used certain drugs - strong stimulants, to back up some of his other activites. This time he was in trouble with the local police several times, for being drunk and incapable, or else disorderly - and was due to appear in court today. He was put in police cells about 3 times, and was in hospital A & E three times also. We managed to get that put off until he is out of hospital and recovered enough; I made sure that his other 2 fines (£40 and £80) were paid.

I am now deperately trying to get his psychiatric team to find some programme that will work for Tom. He needs strong reinforcement not to drink, and also residential therapy in the future. They are looking into getting him into a residential rehab. to train him away from his alcohol use. I also found out about a local hospital called "The Cassel" (Richmond) that takes NHS patients for psychotherapy: this is if they have personality disorders, and may be suicidal or substance abusers. Some of this certainly applies to Tom. He says he was feeling suicidal before he started drinking, and kept saying he wanted to die while he was desperate to be admitted to a mental hospital (while he was drinking, or withdrawing from alcohol). But even if we can get him in to this specialised hospital, there is bound to be a waiting list. One way or the other he has to get through the next few weeks and months, off the booze.

His psychiatric team have recommended that he try AA again - they give a strong anit-drinking message he needs to hear. They have a support network. He is now saying he will consider going back to AA meetings, and be wiser about how he uses them. We do not yet know how long he will be kept in hospital this time - it is at least a respite. I have found it very difficult to carry out my weekly Criminology teaching for Birkbeck College while this has gone on - also our social life went to the wall. I could not take time away get to my church for over a week. I had to cancel the short holiday I was going to take soon, to Vienna (5 days only): I managed to get a partial refund. I also had to cancel a driving lesson again, and lose about £45. Apart from that, our daily sleep, cleaning and cooking - just existing - was severely disrupted, and D. (husband) said he could not take any more. Tom knows the trouble he has caused, and is sorry. But he is mentally ill, and needs better support. I know the National Health Service is offering what it can - but this is so limited (Mental Health is a Cinderella service in many countries).

I just pray and trust that things will not revert to chaos again so quickly - we want to move forward and have some hope. So does Tom. He is trying... May God help him to succeed. I am grateful for the help and support of my good friends, my sister, some of our neighbours, and my church (the "brothers & sisters" there). It is harder for D. who has little of a social network, and is retired - he mainly has me, but the church people pray for him too. He has comfort from our old ginger cat, Whitton.

Well I have finished this after all - in a way. I will write again when there's more to add. Now it's time to prepare our simple evening meal (fish, peas and potatoes) and relax with the television and radio.

Goodbye, good health and God bless -

Tigey